While listening to NPR pass along a press release about advancements in the “art” of 3-D movies (as if it were actual news), I had the reaction I always have to reminders of our crass, infantile, commercial culture: I decided to go live in a cave. But I reminded myself that, in trying to stay immune from popular culture over the years, I’ve already put myself in a cave of sorts. I moved to rural South Carolina and ditched the tv ten years ago. And I usually bark ferociously at anyone who dares suggest that some new movie or television show has an ounce of entertainment value. I’ve never seen Paris Hilton, aside from People magazine, I never know which teams are playing the Super Bowl, and I have no idea what the majority of electronic gizmos being advertised in recent years actually do. You name it, I’ve never heard of it. And yet the monstrous, flatulent evil that is modern corporate culture still sneaks into my cave, and I respond with the same level of anger I had back when I was flipping channels with the rest of the lemmings.
So I’ve decided to do my duty as an American and start complaining. And I’ve decided to do it in the traditional format of the snotty, dissatisfied consumer, the blog. So I welcome you to Mr. Product, a first-person exploration into the terrifying world of modern Capitalism. I’ll be examining the store shelves, the news items, the internet buzz, and any other evidence of our cultural downfall that happens to roam into my field of vision. And I assure you, my soon-to-be-faithful readers, that I will do so with the utter contempt the steaming piles of corporate product deserve. Join me, won’t you?